Initially, once I say “have sexual intimacy each 48 hours,” I’m not speaking about penis-in-vagina intercourse solely. It’s essential for {couples} to expand their definition of sex to incorporate different types of sexual intimacy equivalent to sensate contact, sensual therapeutic massage, guide stimulation, and bare cuddling, simply to call a couple of. There are numerous varieties of sexual contact that may be bodily pleasurable, and all of it helps {couples} foster extra intimacy and connection.

So how does the 48-hour intercourse problem work? 

For {couples} open and keen, I usually counsel turning this right into a sport: When one accomplice asks for sexual intimacy, it’s as much as the opposite accomplice to say sure after which decide what sort of intercourse act they’d prefer to take part in, in addition to when they want it to occur, inside 24 hours of the “ask.”

The aim is to get extra snug saying “sure” to your accomplice and to make intercourse extra of a precedence within the relationship. I additionally counsel protecting a “Captain’s Log” to your accomplice, the place you possibly can write down something you loved after an encounter to bear in mind for subsequent time.

I’ll normally pair the sexual intimacy with the Gottman Card Decks, an Imago Appreciation Dialogue, or the “36 Questions to Fall in Love.” These video games and workout routines improve the psychological and emotional intimacy, which is important to foster concurrently as a pair is engaged on enhancing their sexual connection.  

It’s additionally essential for them to handle any previous points round disgrace and intercourse in remedy—I definitely don’t simply advocate this train to {couples} after they first stroll in. Many interpersonal and psychological points can contribute to want discrepancy, that are essential to unpack as a pair earlier than diving right into a beefed-up intercourse routine.